Tuesday, 9 October 2012

Happy Thanksgiving my Baby Alanna

Hi my Baby Alanna,

Happy Thanksgiving! I survived our first holiday without you. I think it was one of the hardest long weekend I spent(so far). I had to smile  and greet everyone "Happy Thanksgiving" and everytime I said those words I remembered you. There were times when I wanted to cry and break into tears. I am glad I was able to control each one of them --my heart still longs for you, I miss you.

Everything reminds me of you, God knows I tried so hard to think about something else but everything bounces back... always thought what it would be like with you, with us as a family....and it just hurts me that I will never know. I will never be with you again, not on this lifetime. I know I shouldn't be crying because I know you are up there with Him but I just can't stop thinking about what it would be like celebrating holidays with you. 

I am thankful though for the little memory that we had together. Mommy learned so much! ' Made me love your brothers and sister more and brought closeness to our family, friends and to God. Its just sad that I learned these things through losing someone I love so much.

I love and miss you my baby Alanna... through Infinity and beyond~!

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